Rude? Maybe....but it made me laugh

I read this note a pregnant woman wrote to her family and friends and it made me laugh.  I think it would be terribly rude to actually send to people, but I think every first time mom would wish they could.  Here it is for you to enjoy.....

Hello to all of our generous and loving family and friends.  If you are reading this than we consider you to be very special and expect to see you soon after the baby arrives to introduce you the new Center of our Universe.  The following is a list of things that we are slightly concerned about and would like to share with you in an effort to avoid unnecessary fighting and hurt feelings.  Some of them might seem obvious or rude to mention, but they may be things visitors might forget or not think about.


1. Please do not come to the hospital or to our home unannounced.  While we are anxious to see you, the little one and I will been getting to know each other and need our privacy to do so.  I would hate for someone to show up unannounced and be scared by the sight of me learning to breast feeding or trying to get to the bathroom.  You may be thinking that this would not bother YOU....but it will in fact bother ME.

2. Wash your hands or use anti-bacterial hand sanitizer before you pick the little one up.  And please wait until we offer for you to pick him up, rather than just taking him from our arms or any other place he is resting comfortably.  It may have taken us a good amount of time to get him that content.

3. Don't make any unfavorable remarks about the baby or me.  I just got done laboring him out and the last thing I want to hear is how awful I look or that he has a cone head.  He will look perfect to me and I will not be concerned with how I look, so your remarks about any abnormalities are likely to reduce me to a sobbing mess. 

4. Be mindful of how long you visit.  30-45 minutes is plenty of time.  So, unless you are helping with chores or cooking us a meal I will be overwhelmed.  Also keep in mind that if the little one starts to cry it is probably because he is hungry or needs a nap.  While you may feel totally comfortable with me breastfeeding in front of you, I will not and will not be going into hiding because you are visiting.  Kindly take this as your cue to exit.

5. Lastly, don't be a know-it-all when it comes to the baby or how I should be behaving during this time.  Please remember - he is new at this, I am new at this and we are learning.  Think of it this way...if your teacher gives you all the answers to the test how much did you really learn.  And I don't need you reminding me that my bathroom isn't clean or that the dishwasher needs to be run.

Thank you for caring enough to read this whole letter.  It can mostly be summed up by saying....please be positive, reassuring and supportive and if you don't have something nice to say....DON'T COME OVER!